The rear end of CHRISTmas eve

WELL, today is the day I was nationalized into the Canadian district. I'm now officially purely perverted and an expert on maple syrup and moose diarrhea. Tomorrow is a very occasionally occasion. Sad and solemn, we agreed to invite our Aunt Lindsay and Fiona Suicide. And her spawn. I got a tamborine! And........SOCKS! Big grey socks, long and wooly. Which makes the hair on my right leg stand as if they hadn't been shaved in a month!--Which is precisely the case.